|
 |
 |
           |
|
"SELLING THE SIZZLE"
LP/CD Mint/Lookout! Records 1996. Produced by Mass Giorgini at Sonic Iguana Studio, Lafayette Indiana USA, September 1995. "To Serve, Protect And Entertain" (written by Nick on tour, 1994) Hats off to the new entertainers Yeah yeah, yeah, yeah Hats off to the heroes of the TV Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah Stimulating what used to be simulating Yeah Yeah, Yeah Yeah Becoming a star so we can be free Yeah Yeah Yeah Yeah To serve and protect To serve and protect To serve, protect and entertain One two three four, Nielsen ratings gonna sore! Yeah yeah yeah yeah Twenty four-seven hate everyone appreciate What the long arm does for you, and the flexing it goes through To Serve Protect and Entertain "Especially You" (written by Dave, 1991) Get out of my life I'm not looking for no one Especially you You're sexy enough, but sex I can get anywhere No use begging or crying or scratching your eyes out I'm sick of your lies and your kind and Especially You Especially You Say What? Well I'm suprised that it's lasted this long, Did you think that it would? But love is a question of hate Especially You If love is an ocean I'm lost on a river Without a canoe Don't bait me with sex I'm a mackarel without any gills When you sucked on my tongue I got bored of your forehead You taste like a peach And I'm sick of Especially You Especially You Say what? Well I'm suprised that it's lasted this long Did you think that it would? But love is a question of hate Especially You "Bishy Bishy" (written by Grant, 1995) Bishy Bishy C'mon little honey Bishy Bishy C'mon with me (x 2) Confusion and cafuffle going on all night yeah Ba Ba Ba Ba Ba One of the guys just wasn't feeling right Ba Ba Ba Ba Ba Ba Ba Ba Let me explain it to you baby in your native tongue Ba Ba Ba Ba Ba Let's make a dance, it'll be more fun! Bishy Bishy C'mon little honey Bishy Bishy C'mon with me It's a hot wet dance that's a little bit painful Ba Ba Ba Ba ba Take a good square squat and a nice hot shot yeah Ba Ba Ba Ba Ba Ba Ba Ba Ba No roughage is required if you wanna do it right now Ba Ba Ba Ba Ba Bishy Bishy C'mon little honey Bishy Bishy C'mon with me Well it's disgusting Yeah Yeah Yeah And it's pathetic Whoa Whoa Whoa Well it's degrading Yeah Yeah Yeah But it's just for you and me, Yeah it's just for you an me Bishy Bishy C'mon little honey Bishy Bishy C'mon with me "Big Trouble" (written by Grant, 1995) Hiding in the alleys and the vacant lots All over town in the dangerous spots it's wating there for you like a forbidden fruit and if you hang around to long it's going to swallow you Hang, you better not Hang, you better not Hang, you better not hang around now Trouble, you better watch out You're in Big Trouble, you better watch out Trouble, you better watch out You're in big trouble you better watch out Skunk weed, crystal meth and watered-down beer Cocaine, stolen shoes, a deadly career It's on every street, on every face what's a soul to do but get in the race? Hang, you better not Hang, you better not Hang, you better not hang around now Trouble, you better watch out You're in big trouble, you better watch out Trouble you better watch out You're in big trouble you better watch out Trouble, trouble, trouble, trouble Punched up, knocked down whatever it takes, To ease the pain and get rid of the shakes Knocked down, flat-out, pissing in your pants Oh my god, what is up with that? Hang, you better not Hang, you better not Hang, you better not hang around now Trouble, you better watch out You're in big trouble, you better watch out Trouble you better watch out You're in big trouble you better watch out Trouble, trouble, trouble, trouble "She Ain't No Egyptian" (written by Nick, 1995) Who's that girl? Look she's comin' at ya Where's she from? Same as Cleopatra Curves like the Nile but has a better smile She worships her cat and I worship her style What's she like? No one knows for certain What's she do? Sacrifices virgins. How do I meet a girl like that? Who curves like the Nile and worships her cat She ain't no Egyptian x 2 Oh no no no x 3 What's she got? Wonders of the world. What to do? Make her your girl. I'm shakin' in the knees 'cause the mystery Of the girl who ain't egyptian who's standing next to me. She ain't no Egyptian x 2 Oh no no no x 3 "Death Of A Romantic" (written by Nick, 1993) The death of a romantic was brought on by you On the day we met, the sunset was shared by two But the death of a romantic was brought on by you And now you wonder where he is. It's a question of semantics despite your point of view Infactuation breeds a heart that needs more than the truth But the death of a romantic was brought on by you and now you wonder where he is. I wish I never believed your ideals of perfection Cause what you needed was not a treat, it's a chore Well it sickens and it shakes In the comfort of stagnation And I can't appreciate all the things I adore, No I can't appreciate all the things I adore. "The Dedication" (performed by Freddy "Boom Boom" Cannon in 1965, but we completely changed most of the lyrics without Boom Boom's permission) Oh yeah! Oh yeah! Oh yeah! Oh yeah! Oh Yeah! Oh yeah! Oh yeah! Oh yeah! This song goes out to Bobby, dedicated from Sue, She just wants him to know, her love for him is true. And this song goes out to Soraya, dedicated from Nick, He would like another tour of the pyramids! Don't touch that dial, Leave it on the station, I'm going to make, another Dedication Oh yeah! Oh yeah! Oh yeah! Oh yeah! Oh Yeah! Oh yeah! Oh yeah! Oh yeah! This song goes out to Mary, dedicated from Bryce He's so sorry they had a fight and he promises he'll be nice. And this song goes out to Neko, dedicated from Dave, He just wants her to know that after Bronson she's the fave! Don't touch that dial, Leave it on the station, I'm going to make, another Dedication Oh yeah! Oh yeah! Oh yeah! Oh yeah! Oh Yeah! Oh yeah! Oh yeah! Oh yeah! This goes out to all the kids who've come out to see one of our crummy show! I'm talkin' about that guy I grabbed by the hair in San Francisco, And that guy I put in a headlock in Moncton New Brunswick And that chick I kicked in the ass, in fuck, was it Kamloops? Oh yeah! Oh yeah! Oh yeah! Oh yeah! Oh Yeah! Oh yeah! Oh yeah! Oh yeah! This song goes out to CC, dedicated from Beez, (BEEZ: "That's ME!") He just belched and he's so sorry that he's such a sleaze. And this song goes out to Jenni, WHERE ARE YOU?, dedicated from Grant, It'd be nice, if you would come, and pick up your pants! Don't touch that dial, Leave it on the station, I'm going to make, another Dedication Oh yeah! Oh yeah! Oh yeah! Oh yeah! Oh Yeah! Oh yeah! Oh yeah! Oh yeah! And this one goes out to the kid I beat with a mic stand in Atlanta (sorry) And to my aunt and uncle in Albany I'm sorry I clogged up that toilet And to that stupid skinhead in Lafayette! Oh yeah! Oh yeah! Oh yeah! Oh yeah! Oh Yeah! Oh yeah! Oh yeah! Oh yeah! "I Need A Vacation" (written by Grant, 1995) Well there's a little bitty bug that's always biting me It's not crabs, not lice, not a pyhsicality It's an urge deep down in my gut, that tells me to take a global strut The islands of the Pacific that call to me And the fjords of Scandinavia that say "come and see" The jungles of the tropics and the barrens of the north It's this world of mine and I want to go forth I just wanna go all over the world I just wanna go all over the world I just gotta get outta town Make like a tree and not hang around I just wanna go I just wanna go I just wanna go all over the world I need a vacation and it's gotta be real, A train, a plane or an automobile Get my ass moving into another place Stamp my passport and put a smile on my face It's the Alabama heat that I like best And the Himilayan peaks that top the rest The corn of Indiana that tastes so sweet I'm Canadian so be nice to me I just wanna go all over the world I just wanna go all over the world I just gotta get outta town Make like a tree and not hang around I just wanna go I just wanna go I just wanna go all over the world All over the world All over the world I Just wanna go all over the world. "B + I" (written by Dave in Tacoma WA, 1995) And on this day, I'll go to the store, And I'll buy that boat that green one over there What about that shirt? Shiny cotton shirt? Something a about a dieing why, pour que? There's no accounting for taste cuz everyone agrees At least everyone I hang out with I want a toothbrush that bleeds I want the B+I ! Oh yeah And on this day, in my fantasy Clown noses are for sale in isle three I walk to my car, a brown Dodge Colt Nothin' fancy but I love that car "Oldies" "Pick 'Em Up Truck" (written by Grant en route to Sonic Iguana, 1995) She picks 'em up in the pick 'em up truck, She picks 'em up to try her luck It's destination-love in the pick 'em up truck Anything goes in the pick 'em up truck Well she rattles down Marine looking for her mate, she spies a lovely fix and she slams on the brakes. It's quickly hot 'n' heavy and it's never too late Time stands still on the truckin' date. She picks 'em up in the pick 'em up truck, She picks 'em up to try her luck The windows get steamy in the pick 'em up truck Anything goes in the pick 'em up truck She don't wanna be no turn off, She don't wanna be no show off, She don't wanna get the blow off, She just wants to be amused, when you're nude, she won't be crude, she'll make you swoon! She picks 'em up in the pick 'em up truck, She picks 'em up to try her luck The shocks are almost gone in the pick 'em up truck Time stands still in the pick 'em up truck For a nice tight squeeze it's Lighthouse Park, For an all-night longer it's the North Van docks, A joy riding papa likes Stanley Park, It really doesn't matter as long as it's dark. She picks 'em up in the pick 'em up truck, She picks 'em up to try her luck Yummy Yummy Yummy in the pick 'em up truck Anything goes in the pick 'em up truck She likes smooching in the pick 'em up truck Anything goes in the pick 'em up truck... Pick 'Em Up Truck! "Queasy" (written by Dave, 1994) Well that's one messed up reindeer, staggering behind the sleigh He don't feel much like Christmas cheer, cuz he's had too many Christmas beer, When Rudolph throws a party man, you better stay home that day, Cause it's drinking games and fighting all the way. There's a road through the stratosphere, There are children who've been good this year, But the leader of the reindeer, Is a no-good, womanizin', party-achin', Christmas-cursin', sleigh-jerkin', pill-poppin', drinkin-rodent, son of a gun. It's four A.M. and they're almost done, Santa really cracked the whip tonight, He'll make it home by day-break and sleep it off till Christmas '98, He barfed all over the known continents, man he really did it all the same, And that's how Queasy The Reindeer got his name. "Bad Guys" (written by Dave, 1995) You better watch your step, you better wear soft shoes but not for dancing Well we're on a mission propelled by glory by guys like Norris and Action Jackson Oh, where everyone's dirty and everyone's mean, fists of fury and guns a blazin', Heaven knows what danger lies inside Bad Guys. On the back side streets there are ugly dudes just a-waiting, Oh yeah it's six on one, and your side-kick Dick is at a wedding, He's getting married to a suntanned lady with legs forever She knows Kapu, I think her name is Heather Heaven knows what danger lies inside bad guys But Dusty knows what this game is about, He keeps his dialogue short so he can consentrate on kickin' and fightin' his way into the hearts of millions, he's our saviour. So gentlemen, we met again... "Reno Nickel" (written by Grant in Nevada, 1993) I'm gonna spin down to Reno gonna have me a gas I'm gonna fly down to Reno on my First-Class pass Get me a '40' and a tight mod suit My pockets'll overflow with the silver loot. Cuz it's the town of the northern lights, .99 cents for breakfast all night Biggest little city in all the world, Sippin' free gin watching circus girls Alright I lost it all On a Reno Nickel I lost it all On a Reno Nickel Ain't nothing wrong with a little free hootch but ya gotta tip them ladies or you'll get the boot Carsy gets mad and hits the machine Stomps away while I press "cash-out" Marr's doing well on the corner track Robynn's trying to win a Pink Cadillac It's a town for livin' and a town for losin', Get another look at that sauced-up floozie! I lost it all On a Reno Nickel I lost it all On a Reno Nickel Cuz it's the town of the northern lights, .99 cents for breakfast all night Biggest little city in all the world, Sippin' free gin watching circus girls Alright All I need is my Reno Nickel All I need is my Reno Nickel! "Barkerville" (written by Nick in the bush outside of Barkerville, 1995) Well there's a fever in those hills, look to the left, look to the right Gentleman, gentleman, gentleman kill Don't be a fool, it's outta sight. Forging shoes day after day, the Blacksmith of Barkerville earns his pay He dreams of leaving his butt-fuck aboad and he stares at the hills, He wants the motherload. What live at the end of Lightning Creek? Twenty six years of Yugoslavian dreams Trained his dog to sit, fetch and kill, The fever's got the old miner Phil Fish or hunt or get the fuck off his land, Away from what he wants What he wants in this hand. Blacksmith, blacksmith what have you done He followed a hunch and bought him a gun His Slavic tounge doesn't believe in war, But when miner Phil walked through that door, He killed the blacksmith and yes it's drag, Floating down the mighty Fraser, In a body-bag. |